Being Human: A not funny, not interesting, not sarcastic post

I wish I was a better writer....but this is what I'm posting:

There is a story which has stuck with me from college. It's a very simple story but a very odd story. My professor at the time was a 70-80 something year old with a phD in psychology. He had gotten to the point in his life where life was beautiful for just being 'life'. The kind of person who can sit back and really examine the social aspects of how humans interact without being petty....but then again he also had a penchant for wildly gesticulating and swearing in class. So needless to say, I was always intrigued.

So.

The story:

In the 1940's after the allied forces had just taken back France. Naturally like any occupied country some people capitulated with their captors and assisted them. In this case the Nazi's. Some people made it their job to go around and interrogate these people and deem them friend or foe based on their participation. My professor at the time had been part of this group playing mop up. The story that struck me most was that of a young French woman. Her crimes have long since been forgotten (if he even mentioned them). During the course of interrogation there were two officers, an American (my professor) and a French man. There is nothing notable about what was said during the interrogation, at least to the young French lady. Upon exiting the young French woman knew nothing of her fate. Though the French man having heard it all had already signed her death warrant. Whatever war or political crimes she had been guilty of doesn't really matter...because unlike a common criminal they did not shackle her up and march her off to the gallows under the reign of rotten fruit. No. They were very cordial and friendly to her, as if no trespasses had been committed against her fellow countrymen. They walked her out to an awaiting army vehicle where she would be taken away to her later fate (unknown to her). Upon saying good bye the French man exchanged a very friendly good bye of kiss with the young French lady. Not too far from what two lovers would do for a casual parting of ways. Except this exchange was with a person he just sentenced to death.

So where does that leave this story in my mind? This small story which lacks names, details, or any particular facts that would make it incredibly interesting to tell or justify the sentence of death...why do I talk about it? Why does it ring so well with me? I think it's because no matter what, even when stuff is 'fuct' we are still human at the core. We can always be better than the horrible acts we commit,even if the good seems left undone.

So you dealt with that vomit...so here is something for your troubles:

(from: http://fixedgearbikes.blogspot.com/ )

Update: my naughty bits...

UPDATE: After 8hrs in the saddle this weened the groin seems to be back to normal. Best part? I can't feel the "uneasy feeling" of the hernia...which leads me to a very bad conclusion -> I won't be able to compete in CX this season. This "sucks balls" because I've put almost $2k into gear...on the other hand there is always next year after I get repaired (patched like a tube) to do it "the right way". Plus let's face it, a CX bike is probably the best thing since sliced bread in MI for winter riding. Just need to bastardize the Gucci race rig with some studded tires and full fenders (ewwwwww, heavy).

The plan: I will keep things low key the rest of this week and possibly throw in some minor 10-15min sessions of running. Not holding any high hopes. It is pretty clear at this point in the season the smartest thing is to just call CX D.O.A. and enjoy the time I have left in the fall.

cyclocross: she's a cruel bitch

The Short:

So I went to strangle this bitch called cyclocross and all I got was...well see image above.

The Long:

Kisscross #1 9/18:

The race went off without a hitch. First time I raced on my cx bike. Only had two mount/dismount sections. Moderately sore post race but nothing horrible. Examined pictures post fact and my mounting skills lacked the monkey like skillz of Tom Burke.

Kisscross #2 9/19:

Similar course, same feeling as race #1. After the race however even going to mount onto my bike in the parking lot was a horribly painful experience. I rode later that day with no ill effect or discomfort. As a result I started to incorporate stretching of the groin into my routine with heavy emphasis on warming up before doing any intervals as my groin was still a little sore. Feeling around later that night I felt some strange stuff when I pushed. Kind of like a balloon. I knew what it was…but at least it wasn’t near the actual pain I was feeling.

Doctors Apt 9/15:

I have a hernia. No clue how or when I acquired it. Mother fucker. Not a bad one. Just causes an unsettling feeling. Repairs can wait till the off season. Time to start surgeon shopping. Groin pain persisted the rest of the week but it felt more like someone was stepping on my right nut, no where near my hernia.

Friday 9/25:

After my opener ride I practiced some mounts/dismounts on my cx bike just to gauge my new found groin pain. I felt a twinge. Nothing that really hurt, stretched a little more, but the twinge was still there. For future reference if you feel anything not normal in your groin muscles. Stop. Take a day off...don't race, don’t fuck around, take it easy.

Tailwind CX #1 9/26:

I showed up not knowing if it was a good idea or not. Somewhere between lap one and lap two the pain in my groin started. It became so bad that approaching the barriers or stairs caused me anxiety. Wasn't even sure I could lift my legs. After 15min of racing I called it. DNF. I had a problem and it was serious. The pain was undeniable and racing for 3-4^th from DFL isn’t on my list of life goals. Fuck it.

So now I’m all crippled. Who knew someone who rode a bike all year would have such problems surmounting 18’’? I certainly didn’t. Right now it looks like I’ll be skipping Ithica CX and doing very little groin related activities till next week. No point in risking the few races I have left to the season just to be greedy. Sometimes it takes your coach reminding you that indeed this is the OFF SEASON.

Upside? Looks like I will be incorporating some fun exercises into my weekly routines...such as running. Oh joy. Good article on CX groin related fun here: http://cxmagazine.com/training-for-cyclocross-mounts-dismounts-no-injury

Remember: lurking is legal, stalking is not.

My season my end more abruptly than I would like.... This weekend's cyclocross racing will be very telling. With the way things have been progressing I don't think I will make it to Iceman. Though lets face it, I'm a roadie now, so no loss. One less sandbagger in the Expert 25-29 field and one less nutter at the line of 4,000 crazies.

Stay tuned for FAIL. I hear Tailwind CX A's is a beast of a field. As always the goal is to not be lapped and not be DFL (or DNF).

09/09/09 .....hmmm

Today date contains all 9's...so go out and ride your favorite 9 speed bike (preferably 3 up front w/a 12-27t cassette) and celebrate.

Celebrate what you ask? Not sure. I'm sure some pagan religion is killing people as we speak...but you? You can go ride your bike because human sacrifice is still frowned upon in most cultures. Consider your blood and sweat sacrifice enough for the cycling gods. At least until that societal frown turns upside down.

Oh ya almost forgot...cx bike on deck:

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=57195401&l=ff96455ac4&id=2311702

Will match those nice red sidi shoes quite well:

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=56983582&l=5e65c2bd18&id=2311702

who's showing up? oh fuck....

I've spent the last few days in the company of giants. Those cycling figures who used to loom large in the forefront of my imagination. The names that would be listed on the possible ride roster and you'd simply think "oh fuck".

For the first time I got to pick their brains and get the true depth of their character. It has me thinking again...not about cycling but about life. Cycling is a great sport but to be a full person you have to give depth to your life outside of it. Unannounced to me they have been masters at both for years, long before I rode a bike for sport. The best part is they are not without flaws, they are human...

...Thanks for the inspiration. Maybe I'll stick with this shit for another year...maybe.

an introspective chat with a friend...

me: It would help if i wasnt in a mental funk for the last two weeks.

cyclistBud: heh, yea been there done that.

cyclistBud: figuring out how to dig yourself out of that mental hole is tricky.

cyclistBud: i think i hit that around may/june.

cyclistBud: all because of vagina.

me: yep...damn gash, always gets you.

me: 2008 year of over training, 2009 year of the gash.

cyclistBud: heh.

me: 2010? TBD.

cyclistBud: has it made your results good this year?

cyclistBud: i would almost have to say looking at results only it was a 'good' thing.

cyclistBud: from the mental stability point - eh... not so much.

me: not sure. I know its caused other riders in the peleton unnecessary pain.

W

Picture above: Last W in cat 3's @ 2009 Cherry Roubaix Road Race. Couldn't have done it without the support and backing of my team. Thank you. It means more than you will ever know.

Welcome to the fall: "This will not be over quickly. You will not enjoy this."

Back to the grind. No racing this weekend, just riding. Drop me a line if you have any interesting rides planned...or parties...

Update...

This blog will lack any (as if there could be less) interesting content for a while. If I am ambitious (pfff) maybe I will learn how to update it from my phone. Many interesting posts and pictures are lost in translation between capture and the subsiquent brain fart release. Any tips or tricks on mobile posting/pic upload to blogspot would be much appreciated. Sorry no iphone to pull a fat cyclist. So please keep your hipster iphone tips to a minimum. I have windows mobile.

ordering some of this stuff...since most of you are local let me know if you want to monkey on my order: http://www.twinsix.com/gear/the-stuff/fat-cyclist

.....

Funk Deez Nutz

Not sure if it's been my recent three month battle against some kind of fungus that lives in my shorts or the lack of validation…but I'm in a funk. Not a training funk mind you, this is a pure and simple discipline funk. The last five years as a cyclist have been predicated around the dirt. Train on road to race off has always been the moto. Recently I've been more disillusioned with the spotty Michigan mountain bike scene. Within three minutes of being at the start line I can guess my final place within a few spots. Besides, what are you racing for anyway? There isn't even a carrot since the mmba has puckered up so tight you could give it a penny and get back wire. There is just no comparable series other states have.

Racing road the last few weekends…has been enjoyable. Not in the typical sense of joy. No. This is Adam we are talking about. No sir, no typical here. I enjoy it…well…Mr.Topher Chase put it best:

I love killing dreams.

I endure pain all winter training so that later I can inflict it on YOU. Nothing personal…but your failure is my success. Mountain biking never really validated me in that respect because you hardly see anyone. In the road scene you get to watch people suffer up close for hours on end. So next time you look over in the break and see me…be sure you are smiling, because if you aren't, I will be on the inside.

As for dirt...we shall see. Right now I am shifting it to the back burner till after SBF. Too many dreams and not enough races.

2008: The Year Of POWER!

Lets get to the meat...between the seat?

Disclaimer: I do not keep track of stats by bike, congrats to those of you who do. I have trouble keeping up with the data logging as it stands...so as a result my rb and mtb stats are a bit fudged because of trainer confusion....oops. The perils of owning a mtb powerTap mid season.

Road bike: 2003 Klein
TIME 458:15:57
DIST 8084.85

Mountain bike: 2008 RM Element Team / Vertex 70 / Kona Unit SS / MooU
TIME 229:08:42
DIST 3194.56

Trainer: rb and mtb's
TIME 203:09:29
DIST 8084.85

Racing: results here
TIME 56:19:44
DIST 912.67

TOTALS
TIME 679:36:27
DIST 11162.47



For you power monkey's here is my 2008 season in the form of TSB/ATL/CTL:


For those of you who track my weight here is some fun history:
SUMMARY:
All in all I've achieved every goal I set for myself in 2008. Some would argue that you should set goals that aren't achievable, but that just isn't my style. I am a person who pays a coach so I can sit down, shut up, and ride.

1) make the jump to Elite mtb and make sure my road license followed suit [done]
2) lose more weight. target weight of 155lbs [uhh, ya but not enough]

Special Thanks to Trails-Edge Staff Micheal "moose mitts" Flack and Aaron "the man" Mihalko. They've tolerated my perma funk this long, maybe they can tolerate it another season...maybe.

So what's next for 2009?
1) drop more weight: target 145-149lbs
2) get faster: break that mythical 5.0 watts/kg barrier
3) carve out a spot in the elite mtb field.

And as always...

To a fallen soldier....

Doppelganger....